Friday, May 6, 2011

Dear Universe...

Clearly facing one loss this month wasn't nearly enough for our family, so you threw in the loss of one of my husband's best friends -- who died of a heart attack yesterday at his desk.  And at a time when my husband is away from home, holding the hand of his father as his father also faces the likely end of his life.

Grim reaper, indeed.  Oh, ye of little permanence, I see what you are doing.

But I refuse to despair.

Even though you have now sent me a nasty case of bronchitis on top of everything else, and horse pill sized antibiotics that I have to swallow down with a gallon of water and a prayer that they won't get stuck halfway.

Here's the thing:  it isn't about the losses, it is about the love you gave to them -- and that they gave to you -- along the way.  And that you give to the ones who are still with you, every day, every hour, every chance you get.

You think I haven't learned that lesson yet, but I have.


And while I am grateful for all my blessings -- I truly am -- I would love to be able to actually take a breath at some point, relax and enjoy them instead of feeling like I'm running flat out toward the next oncoming disaster.

Think we might find a breather in the near future so that I could do just that?  Because lord knows I could use one.

PS -- Prayers for my father in law, who is laboring to breathe today, would be most welcome.  It has been one of those weeks months years three year periods of way too much loss, thank you very much...

(Lovely photo via felizberto - Emmanuel Avetta.  Love this shot.)

3 comments:

Jane dV said...

Oh Christy,

You and your family are, as always, in my thoughts and prayers. Sounds as if we all need to redouble our prayers, good thoughts, well wishes towards WV and AZ.It has been a tough time for awhile, hasn't it?

Was thinking about you earlier today and hoping that you and the Peanut could enjoy Mother's Day despite the strain of Mr. RedHedd's being away and his dad's struggles. Now to read of the loss of B.'s friend, hardly know what to say.

Please have the Peanut give you a very big hug. Maybe you, she, PJ and Roxie can all curl up together for a bit?

Christy Hardin Smith said...

It has been a very, very tough last few years. And, in all honesty, I'd like a break from being tested -- we all would. But life doesn't really work that way, now does it? SIGH

Anonymous said...

Thanks for using my photo and thanks to love it! Good all to you!
Emmanuel